Each morning brings new opportunities. It also presents new decisions that need to be made. If you have an indecisive personality, this could mean big stress for you.
These decisions could be big—like whether or not to change jobs—or as small as deciding what to wear to work. For some people, making these choices are automatic. But if you struggle with making decisions, you could have an indecisive personality.
If you have an indecisive personality, it’s likely that you don’t look at decisions as a linear progression—going from A or B—but as a circular exercise—going round and round in your thinking. This thought process can leave you feeling insecure as others get impatient with you, and may even try to bulldoze you.
How can you tell if you have an indecisive personality and what can you do about it?
If you’ve ever taken the Myers Briggs personality profile, you may be familiar with the term “Introverted Intuitives” (IN’s). These are commonly referred to as reflective personality types (thinkers), and they are more likely to be indecisive. (If this is you, read on for some tips to help you make choices with more confidence.)
In my coaching practice, I use temperament as a tool for helping clients learn more about themselves and how they operate—both consciously and subconsciously. In temperament theory, there are two types that can be classified as “indecisive personality:”
The Supine. If you are this personality type, you are a giver, and you want to see others happy—especially with you. You also have a very high need for approval. So if you are a supine, you may struggle with establishing boundaries, finding a sense of closure, and beating yourself up over decisions, always believing that you should have made the other choice. Supines want others to make the decisions so someone else is to blame if things don’t work out.
If you are a supine struggling to make decisions, these tips can help:
- Find one trusted person (not five!) whom you can collaborate with and bounce ideas off of. Let this partner know that you need someone to help work through a situation, but NOT solve it for you or tell you what to do.
- Be okay with whatever decision you finally make, even if it seems like it was the wrong one. Try to rest in the fact that you did the best you could with what you had and often times things happen for a reason.
The Melancholy: If you have a melancholy temperament, you need alone time to regenerate. You likely struggle with perfectionism, so it can be difficult for you to make a choice if you feel like no option meets your high standards. The melancholy needs to appear to be competent and in control, so if you aren’t feeling this way, you’ll probably want to avoid making a decision until you do feel competent.
If you are a melancholy struggling to make decisions, these tips can help:
- Remember that circumstances will always have positive and negative aspects, so stop waiting for that “right” time.
- Learn to flex your mistake muscles. Sometimes you can’t rise to the next level without trial and error. It’s not only okay to make mistakes, it’s good for growth.
If you suspect you have an indecisive personality, or if you’d like to learn more about your unique temperament so you can identify your strengths and overcome your weaknesses, go to www.KrisReece.com and download your free report “What’s Your Temperament?”