Ask most people what they truly want out of life and their answer will likely be, “I just want to be happy.”
While there’s nothing wrong with wanting to feel good, does the pursuit of happiness really bring you happiness?
Not if you’re making one of these five common mistakes:
Happiness Mistake #1: You view delays as denials. Some of us just cannot take no for an answer. But no doesn’t always mean no. It may mean “not now.” You are likely getting that “not now” for good reasons, even if they don’t feel good at the time. A good reason why you may not be getting the result you want is that you need to improve in a certain area in your life before you can truly handle and enjoy the development you’re seeking, instead concentrate on taking the next right step towards your goal.
Happiness Mistake #2: Your circumstances determine your happiness. Don’t make the mistake of thinking your circumstances have to improve before you can be happy. Something in your life will always be broken. You can’t always control your circumstances, but you can control how you view them.
Happiness Mistake #3: You think people are there to make you happy. If you make the mistake of looking to people to make you happy, you will be let down more often than not. After all, your happiness isn’t their responsibility—it’s yours. Relationships are challenging and they take work. The good news is that the challenges and the effort you spend to overcome them refine who you are—hopefully into a better version of yourself.
Happiness Mistake #4: You give to get. There are generous people in this world who derive true joy from giving, but many make the mistake of giving in the hope of getting something in return. If you can’t give out of the goodness of your heart, expecting nothing in return, your motive is self-centered. And being self centered and being happy don’t mix. True happiness comes from connecting with others
Happiness Mistake #5: You settle. I can’t even count how many times I’ve heard people say “I just want…” And they honestly believe that this “just” will be the answer to their happiness. The problem with “just” is it means you are settling. Be honest about your true desires. That “just” that will not make you happy for long.
If you truly want to be happy, consider laying aside your pursuit of happiness and seek purpose and balance instead.
Purpose drives you to something greater and distracts you from everything in this world that seeks to bring you down. Balance reminds you that there is no one thing on this earth that will make you “happy”—you are called to develop yourself in spirit, soul and body.
When you commit to pursuing purpose and balance, your happiness is just around the corner.