Ever wonder where the justice of God is when you’re up against a narcissist’s nasty, toxic behavior?
Whether your battle has been going on for 10 weeks or 10 years, narcissists always wreak havoc in the lives of their victims. What’s worse is that they seem to get away with everything:
- No punishments
- No consequences
- No justice
- Not even so much as a slap on the wrist
This can leave you wondering if they will ever be held accountable for their actions.
Five Ways The Justice of God Works Against the Narcissist
That’s why in today’s episode, we’re going to dive into the five things God ALWAYS does to a narcissist. Once these five truths are revealed, you will never again doubt God’s righteous justice.
So before you start thinking they might get away with what they’ve done to you, stick with me. Not only will I show you how God ensures justice is served, but I’ll also provide you with one practical step to restore your faith and see that justice is done in a timely manner.
Before we dive in, be sure to grab a copy of your FREE Narcissist Survival Guide. This is my free gift to you.
So, let’s dive into the 5 things God ALWAYS does to a narcissist.
This can best be demonstrated through gardening. Gardening is a process that, when done right, yields beautiful results. However, the process may not always make sense, especially to the inexperienced. But whether you have prize-winning begonias or can’t tell a weed from a flower, this breakdown will cultivate your trust and certainty in God’s righteous justice.
In gardening, there’s a process to go from an overgrown, ugly garden to a beautiful, flourishing one. Sometimes that process doesn’t seem to make sense, especially if you’re like me and don’t know the first thing about gardening.
Step 1: He Leaves the Narcissist to Themselves
The first step may seem to happen all on its own, but remember, nothing falls outside of God’s purview. In the case of the garden, it’s overgrown, and the weeds seem to have gotten out of control. An outsider looking in might wonder, “How could someone let this happen?” But God, in His infinite wisdom, will leave a narcissist to themselves. In other words, He’s going to allow those weeds to grow.
This is where it feels the most frustrating, the most unjust, like God doesn’t care about you and He’s just like some spaced-out parent letting this little brat get away with murder. But the truth is, this is the most crucial phase. Without this phase, it makes the steps to come less just. He will let them wreck relationships, burn bridges, and do whatever it takes to bring them to rock bottom.
Romans 1:24 reminds us of what God did to those who didn’t want to follow Him and instead followed after their own sinful, selfish desires: “Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.” This may seem like God has forgotten what they’ve done to you, but hang with me because He actually has a plan. This is also the phase where you have to recognize whether your actions towards them are truly loving or entirely enabling.
Romans 1:24 said God handed them over… in other words, He didn’t try to change them, He didn’t stop them, He didn’t just ‘love’ on them. He let them be to themselves. That’s why it isn’t always the most loving thing to tolerate their toxic behavior.
Step 2: Provide an Opportunity for Repentance
Because that can actually prevent the next step—and they REALLY need the next step. In fact, it reminds me of when I was younger and saw one of our neighbors chopping up the bushes in front of his house. I remember thinking, “WHAT is he doing? They look terrible.” So I went and shared this wacky neighbor’s actions with my friend Cassey. But her mother overheard us and explained to me that he wasn’t destroying his bushes; he was pruning them.
Still wondering why, she explained how pruning actually helps the bushes grow stronger and fuller. I immediately related it to getting a haircut when it’s scraggly, even though your goal is to grow it longer.
That’s exactly what God will do for the narcissist.
2 Peter 3:9 reminds us: “The Lord is not slow in keeping his promise, as some understand slowness. Instead, he is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance.”
Despite their actions—actually, because of their actions—God often provides narcissists with opportunities to repent and change their ways. God will ALWAYS give the narcissists chance after chance to turn from their wicked behaviors.
And before you get upset that God isn’t acting fast enough, remember that His anger was slow towards us too. So one of the best things you can pray is, “Lord, bring them to themselves. Bring them to a place where they have nowhere else to turn but you.”
Step 3: He Exposes Them
But sadly, since narcissists rarely see themselves as the problem, this repentance process is unlikely. So when God says enough is enough, He moves to the next step.
If you’re anything like me, you’ve made some serious mistakes in your life. One of them was going to dark dance clubs, thinking that was the fun life. But have you ever stayed at one of these clubs until closing? When the lights come on and you see the dirty, disgusting mess you’ve been mingling in all night, it’s nasty. But when those lights come on, it shine a spotlight on what’s really going on behind the darkness.
And that’s what happens when God steps in and says, “Okay, you don’t want to repent? You don’t want to accept my chance at a new life? Now it’s time to shine the light and expose the truth.”
Yes, God will expose them. Maybe not in the way you would hope, but God brings the narcissist’s true nature and actions to light. Through various circumstances, the hidden behaviors and manipulations of a narcissist are revealed, ensuring that their deceit and wrongdoing are no longer hidden.
Luke 12:2-3 reminds us: “There is nothing concealed that will not be disclosed, or hidden that will not be made known. What you have said in the dark will be heard in the daylight, and what you have whispered in the ear in the inner rooms will be proclaimed from the roofs.”
Rest assured, my friend, God will NOT be mocked. The narcissist will start reaping what they’ve sown.
But remember, God’s purpose is still going to be for restoration, not destruction. He will reveal their motives and behaviors. Think back to how many years ago you had no idea what you were dealing with. Now, your eyes have been opened to the wickedness of their behavior and, hopefully, you are setting boundaries to protect yourself.
The narcissist hates that. They want to continue in their manipulative, self-centered behaviors with no accountability. But now you see through their love bombing, you see through the lies and deceit. My friend, this is just the beginning. The more they ignore God’s actions, the brighter the spotlight shines.
Step 4: He Limits Their Influence
The fourth action that God will take against the narcissist not only hurts them but actually protects YOU. No, God has not forgotten you. Just like a gardener will apply herbicide to control the spread of weeds, God will limit the narcissist’s influence.
I get it, when you’re in the thick of it, it can be hard to believe that they aren’t operating at full demonic capacity… but they’re not. You may be wondering, “How much worse could it get?” With a narcissist in full control, it would be worse—much worse.
I don’t know why God is even allowing what they’re doing right now, but will you trust Him? He is the God who controls how far the ocean goes; He can certainly limit the narcissist’s impact.
Job 5:12 reminds us that “He thwarts the plans of the crafty so that their hands achieve no success.” And it’s not just a protection for you, but it’s also a prevention of further damage elsewhere.
Have you noticed the narcissist getting more frustrated lately? Perhaps friends are letting them down, or the boss is giving them a hard time. That’s God cutting off their supply.
Step 5: Provides Justice and Vindication for Their Victims
And when He does, action number five feels all the sweeter. Remember that the gardener’s goal is for the garden to flourish. No matter how bad he might feel, no matter how pretty the weeds ‘seem’ to be, he knows they gotta go—he knows they are going to ultimately destroy his garden, so he pulls them up.
They didn’t want to repent and turn from their behaviors. They don’t take the signs God sends as opportunities for restoration. Now come the consequences, and they’re usually quite heavy. Remember, this has been going on for a long time. God is not soft on sin. It’s not a matter of if, it’s a matter of when the narcissist will suffer consequences.
This can come in the way of failed schemes, inner turmoil, isolation and abandonment, loss of power, public humiliation, broken relationships, or perhaps imprisonment. But the worst consequence they will face is when they stand before God’s judgment and potentially suffer eternal separation from Him.
THAT is why God will be slow to anger and give a narcissist chance after chance after chance. But as I said before, God will not be mocked. Narcissists will get their justice, and it will be too late. There will be no one else to blame or manipulate; their fate will be sealed. That’s a sad and sobering reality that you can pray for, but you are not responsible for saving them from their consequences.
One Practical Step You Can Take
Now, I did mention that there was one thing you could do to potentially speed up the justice process. This is something that took me a long time to do, but when I did, it changed everything. No, not overnight. But this one key step saved my sanity and strengthened my faith. I gotta prepare you though; you’re not going to want to do it. In fact, everything in you will bristle like biting into an onion when you expect an apple.
That’s because it goes against everything you’ve been taught and it doesn’t make sense, but when you apply this step, you take the pressure off yourself to try and change the unchangeable and you let God be God.
What’s this step, you ask?
You must set boundaries. God is our master gardener and He will step in to clean the house, but He’s also given you this life and the relationships in it to steward well. Narcissists don’t come in and wreak havoc overnight; their weeds grow. And if you continue to allow these weeds to grow, maybe even feed them because you think it’s the loving thing to do, you’re actually enabling their bad behavior and then wondering where God is.
Your actions (or lack thereof) can actually be a detriment and delay to God’s divine plan. So, set limits on bad behavior (pull those weeds up before they choke out your garden) and let the justice of God deal with the rest.
Still questioning whether God will intervene? Be sure to check out this video on what God will do to the narcissist when He’s had enough.
And don’t forget to grab your FREE Narcissist Survival Guide. It’s my free gift to you to arm you with scriptures to pray and responses to say.