I lived many decades of my life trying desperately to control other people and situations. In classic control freak fashion, I would justify all of my actions (and reactions) by saying things like, “I’m just trying to protect you,” and “I’m not angry, I’m passionate.” I was the type who couldn’t take criticism and blamed others for my misfortune.
And I’ll admit that while I am very happy I am no longer that person, I still get tempted to control sometimes. So I was relieved to discover that there is one area where I was still allowed let my control freak flag fly.
In fact, this is one thing we should all be obsessive about controlling—your thoughts.
That’s right, I want you to apply all of your well-honed controlling muscles on taming your mind.
Romans 12:2 and Ephesians 4:23 reminds us that we are to renew our thoughts daily. That means we need to be in control of what we’re thinking, because if you aren’t, the same toxic thoughts will be controlling your life.
There are 4 steps that you can follow to take control of your toxic thoughts:
Step 1: Capture the thought. 2 Corinthians 10:5 says we are to take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ. The first step in doing this is to continually identify what you’re thinking about and the content of those thoughts -including the feelings.
Step 2: Interrogate the thought. When you notice yourself having a negative thought, ask it questions such as, “Where did you come from?” and “What are you doing here?” Asking these questions can begin to reveal deeper issues—areas of your life that still need healing or old wounds you haven’t let go of.
Step 3: Line it up with Truth. You can spend a lifetime ignoring truth and believing lies. I believe that God’s Word is truth. So, if you’re worrying about finances and God’s word says that He will supply all of your needs (Phil 4:19) that’s a thought that has to go. If He says that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19), then that nagging thought to start eating better likely is from God. When you compare your thoughts to God’s word, you know which thoughts to keep and which to get rid of.
Step 4. Rewrite your thought according to the Word of God (truth). Find the scripture that relates to your thought and then put it into your own words and apply it to whatever situation you’re facing. When a thought is in your own words, you’re more likely to believe it. So, create your new thought and keep repeating it out loud, even if you don’t believe it at first.
If you are struggling with toxic thoughts, I want you to know you’re not alone. There is help. I wrote a book called Build a Beautiful Life Out of Broken Pieces to help you overcome those troublesome thoughts and get back in control of your mind and your life.
Your Friend,
Kris
