There is Nothing Wrong With You

By Kris Reece – Author of Build a Beautiful Life Out of Broken Pieces

Hair color change this week, nails next week, maybe a plastic surgery next month….these are just a few of the everyday ways in which we try to change our outward appearance. I have yet to encounter a woman who was completely satisfied with how she looked.

These all deal with external appearance—how about on the inside? Here too, many women are constantly striving to be something that they are not.

Are you one of them? Do you wish you were smarter, wittier, or more captivating somehow? Do you look at others and crave who and how they are?

4 Secrets to Talking to Kids About Divorce

4 Secrets to Talking to Kids About Divorce

By Kris Reece, Counselor, Divorce Coach

Divorce is stressful for all involved. But for children it can have traumatic, life-altering consequences if not handled properly.

The problem is the two people whom the children rely upon for support, love and care are at complete odds with one another. And that’s in a mild case—in many divorces, the parents are competing for their children’s loyalty and using the kids as tools against the other.

Keeping these 4 steps in mind can help immensely in reducing the toll your divorce will have on your kids’ emotional and mental wellbeing:

5 Secrets Only a Step Mom Knows

It’s no secret that being a stepmom isn’t easy. And if you went into this relationship like most people, you were blind to the difficulties to come–the moments and circumstances that seemed to strike you when you least expected it.

Even if you were one of the wiser ones who did their homework ahead of time, there isn’t enough shelf space to hold all of the books needed to cover each family dynamic. Most books and articles out there support a stepmom rolling over, stepping aside and praying that the years fly by and hoping that things change. They also encourage you to put this big stupid smile on your face and pretend that your lives aren’t being screwed up by a lack of proper training.

If the saying that every family is different is true, then the saying is doubly true for stepfamilies. As I am sure you have learned there are so many varying dynamics, and those dynamics can change in a heartbeat, for the better or for the worse.

The Problem With People Pleasing

By Kris Reece, Counselor, Coach, Speaker

The Problem with People Pleasing

Are you the one who is always such a great team player–your church knows it can call on in a time of need? Or you frequently come to your children’s rescue? Or everyone in your workplace knows you to be a cooperative, giving person? You may be a people pleaser.

People-pleasing is like perfectionism—praised in our society, but not a good thing. Let’s remove the mask of people pleasing and look under the surface at what truly exists.

Many people pleasers appear to be very kind and gentle people who just want to do good for others. But what typically exists below the surface is a great need for recognition and a fear of rejection.

3 Relationship Killers

3 Relationship Killers

Whether you are married, dating, engaged or single, exclusive, monogamous, cheating or playing the field, you are in numerous relationships. You relate to people all day long—be they kids, friends, co-workers, family or the barista at your go-to coffeeshop. How you relate to them determines whether those relationships will create happiness or drama.

Peruse your local bookstore and you will see shelves lined with books on relationships: How to be in relationships, how to end relationships, how to start relationships. I even saw one that talked about how to manipulate relationships. The majority of these books focus on the external factors of relationships—where to meet people, what to say, perhaps even what to wear. You could follow all this advice to the letter–wearing the right clothes, speaking with the right accent, even buying the right gifts, but you could save yourself so much time and energy (and sometimes money) if you would just steer clear of the biggest and most common relationship killers.

These 3 deal-breakers will kill a relationship faster than a monkey choking on a banana. Do them at your own peril. Avoid them to your own advantage.

Relationship Killer #1: Unhealed Hurts from Past Relationships

3 Things Every Mom of a Teenage Daughter Needs to Do

3 Things Every Mom of a Teenage Daughter Needs to Do

If you want a low paying, thankless, emotionally draining, time zapping job….than be a mom!  If you want to add a little bit of craziness and confusion….be a mom to a teenage daughter.

Raising children is tough, but raising teenage girls is a nightmare if you don’t’ know how to navigate through the turbulent teenage years.

These years are absolutely crucial to a girls success in life and overall sense of well-being and security.  So while many moms are throwing their hands up in the air and saying “I made it through, so can she”, this is not the answer.  Many moms back off at this point feeling as if they are losing control of their teenagers and while it can feel this way, it is actually not the case.  In many cases the relationship needs a bit of a shift.

There are 3 things that have helped me as well as countless women navigate through the turbulent teenage years with their girls.